SOMTHING YOU NEED.

Hello Everyone. It has been a while and I know everyone is expecting this post to be about my ongoing story but I’m so sorry to let you know that the story would come once in a week due to my busy schedule. I hope you understand

I used to be someone that really cared about what impression people had about me. I know they say first impression matters a lot but not when you live your life based on what people think about you or what they feel you should be. I was building myself to be the kind of person the society wanted me to be. it was like I started living life based on people’s terms and condition. I was trapped in my own body and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. I was practically doing everything to please people. which put my esteem in so much danger.

I was trying to do it the way A wanted me to and at the same time, I was also trying to do it the way B wanted me to. I was trying so hard to please everyone. if I wanted my hair to be in a certain and A didn’t want my hair to be that way, that was it. I was ready  to go any length to please anybody as far as it made them happy even at the expense of my happiness.

I sought validation in people, so my happiness/sadness depended on people. I could keep talking on how I sought my validation in people but let me stop here.

I am glad it got to a point in my life where I decided to stop letting the thought of people get to me. when I said enough was enough. Jesus didn’t die on the cross for me to live my life to please people but to live my life to please him and honor him.

I cut a whole lot of people out of my life. I focused on being the best I could be not for anybody but for myself.

I made decisions that made me happy. I didn’t wait for anyone to tell me do this before  did it. I made my esteem independent. It wasn’t based on nobody anymore. It was solely based on God and my happiness.

I built healthy relationships. I got acquainted with people who would make me a better person.

Gradually, with time I began to have God get a say in my life and everything started becoming fine and God became the master planner of my life. All I did was to follow him and obey him and in turn, things began to work out for my good.

I ask you this morning, WHERE DO YOU SEEK YOUR VALIDATION FROM?

 

Advertisements

SAVED NOT CAGED 2 (A SHORT FICTION)

SAVED NOT CAGED 2

  “Ademi,Bà wó nì?” (How are you)I said as i picked up my phone.

“Sister Seyi,all is not well o.I need some money.”

“I thought you are done with second semester exams. Kì ló wá n duró shéy?“(What are you still waiting to do) I asked my brother who only knew how to call when he needed money.

“I just want to finish up some stuff ahh”

I could sense the irritation in his voice as i smiled to myself.

‘Sheybe his mother knew how to annoy somebody, he’ll pay for her sins.I’ll show them pepper’

“How much are we looking at here o?,Mr Obalanlege Junior” I asked him

“Let’s say twenty thousand”

Ahn ahn,this boy had so much guts sha o.

Ahn Ahn,Shéy mó jò ìyá eh?(Do i look like your mother?) but i’ve heard you,I’ll transfer the money when i get to the office. I’m still getting ready for work.”

“You see, that’s why you’re my best sibling” Ademide said .

“You see, that’s why you’re a mumu,do you have any other sibling?” I asked him while laughing to myself

“Wooh,bye bye sef,I’ll send it when i get to the office”I said as i ended the call.

  I had better start leaving for work if i didn’t want to go on more errands from Mrs Obalanlege my dear mother.

I hurriedly shut down my laptop, put it in place as i sharply put my feet into my favourite or rather “only presentable” flat shoe.

  “Ò tó gbá àburó” (it is ready to get a younger one,A new one you might like to say) I muttered to myself as i tried to squeeze my right foot into the shoe.

Ìyà Seyi,mó tì n lò o” (Seyi’s mother,I’m leaving already o) I shouted to mama as i locked my room door. Don’t ask me why i lock my door.My mother is capable of anything, I know her too well.

  I didn’t even know where mama was,she didn’t reply to my good bye greeting or maybe she had gone to blend the pepper herself.

I walked to the living room to check for mama as my uber was only six minutes away.I didn’t trust those uber guys,they could lie beyond boundaries.

“Mummy!” I shouted

Kilòdé?” (what is it?) I heard her scream from the backyard.

I went to the backyard to see mama grinding the pepper with a grinding stone.

“Mama,is it up to that?” I asked impatiently

I no beg you before i decide say make i do am?” She answered looking up from her pepper and sizing me with her eyes.

I was about answering her when my phone beeped. My uber was here.

“Well,Éyìn lè mó,Mo tì ló(it is your concern,I’ve left)

“Ò dá  bó”(bye bye) she said without even looking up from what she was doing.

SAVED NOT CAGED 1(A SHORT FICTION)

“Oluwaloseyifunmi!” I thought i heard mama scream.I quickly removed my earpiece from my ear trying to figure out what angle i heard my name from. We were sure the only ones in the compound as i was certain i greeted my three neighbours this morning as they exited the compound for their places of work.

I quickly fixed my earpiece back in my ear cause it seems the act wasn’t helping issues.I needed to finish up quickly and prepare for work.

  “Oluwaloseyifunmi!”I heard clearly this time around. I quickly flung my broom and retied my wrapper.

   I had been the one sweeping the front of our apartment and doing other minor chores in the house ever since mama chased our maid away two weeks ago simply because i was back home from service.I am not mama’s only child,I have a younger brother who is in his third year in one of the federal universities in the country.

    Ademide my younger brother detests coming home for holidays simply because of the excess work he is forced to do whenever he is at home.He prefers to stay in a cousin’s house or sometimes,in school.

  I had just concluded my youth service and lucky enough,I secured a job as a content curator in a branding company somewhere on the island. That was even more than enough reason for mama to chase our maid away.”Your job isn’t stressful” she always said which always gets me very irritated.Papa had left mama for as long as i can remember. Rumours has it that he has settled down with another woman who has four children for him.

  “Mama you called me” I said to her as i removed my phone from somewhere in my wrapper where I had tucked it in to prevent it from falling while i swept. “An iPhone 6S” A present from my boyfriend. I would die if   the screen cracked not to talk of breaking.

“Jò wá bà mi lo atá yi” (please come and help me blend this pepper) mama said to me while smiling in one kind annoying way.That statement was enough to annoy me but the way she smiled added irritation to my anger.

“Mama!help you blend pepper at 7:09am on a Tuesday morning,Mama where are my mates by this time?where am i meant to be by this time?”

“So,you mean say you cannot help me be that?” 

For the love of Christ, if this woman couldn’t speak English, let her stick to her Yoruba or Pidgin. Her mixed language was even getting me more angry and irritated.

At that point,I had decided i wasn’t even going to go back to finish up the sweeping. After all,those bachelors upstairs would come back from work and put their benches there, eat and drink all sort of nonsense and dump it there.They wouldn’t dare when my father was here.

  “Bééni ma,mó ní ìsé”(Yes ma,I have work) I said to her as I picked up my phone from where it was.

PRAYER

PRAYER

 Let prayer be your default setting.Let us stop making prayer our spare tyre. Prayer should be steering wheel.

 Sad? Pray

 Happy? Pray

 In need? Pray

 Satisfied? Pray

 Scared? Pray

    There are so much benefits we stand to gain from praying. In praying, there’s nothing like Disadvantages and Advantages, It is an Advantage all the way.

 Prayer just like a phone, the operating system won’t download or uprage itself. It’s in the cloud. We have to click the download button so it could be downloaded. In the process of downloading, it doesn’t just download at once. It enters percent by percent. 

  Many of us are shortsighted Christians. We do not tend to see the little progress in our lives. We are ignoring the day to day blessings we receive and busy looking out for mighty testimonies that would shake the heavens when we testify.

All we want from God is already available. He is the all sufficient God.I don’t think I’ve ever been in a situation and God says “I am not capable of affording this,find another mean” NEVER.All we want from his is already available, we just need to click the download button (PRAY) to access it.

Jeremiah 33:3- Call unto me and i will answer thee and shew thee great and mighty things ye did not know about.Did you hear that?

I will shew thee great and mighty things ye did not know about. Apparently, there’s a lot God has to reveal to us,So much, More than we can ever imagine.

  A Lion can never reproduce a Hen.No matter how small the Lion’s offspring is,it’s still a Lion. Just incase you didn’t know,here’s it “You are a god” There’s power in you, God has deposited something in you ,he has filled you up with something.

PSALM 82;6 Ye are gods and all of you are children of the most high.

We are gods and God has given us authority over principalities and problems. We need not to worry but to call on his name.

 We are never too busy to pray.David was one of the busiest men in the Bible but still, David prayed SEVEN times a day. And in return, God honoured him.David was the only man in the Bible who never lost a battle. He fought 66 battles and lost zero.

  If busy David could pray 7 times a day,what is your Excuse?

LIVING IN AN OVERSIZED SOCIETY.

Hello Sweethearts. Good morning.

LIVING IN AN OVERSIZED SOCIETY.

   I remember there was this time i went to model for someone. I left my house with the mindset that “I was going for a photoshoot” so asper being the care free person that i am, I planned to do everything with the same outfit i had on. Nothing nothing i only went with powder in my bag, eye pencil that the life had been ruined and one hopeless lipstick. 

Imagine that! So, apparently i went with a friend and she has almost the same attitude as me but hers was worse, she went with nothing. 

   When we got there, we found out that we had to go somewhere else for the shoot and it was actually a modelling job for someone’s clothing line. 

   To cut the long story short, there was no make up artiste to make us up so I made do of my wrecked stuffs to make my friend up, mind you, she’s not the same skin colour as me. when it was time for the shoot, nothing sized me.It was all very very very big. 

I managed to fit myself into one T-shirt which was already looking like a gown.It was time for the footwear (Wahala) because, I wore a sandals to the venue and it wasn’t making any sense on the outfit.

 My point exactly,The Director of the shoot had to give me his sneakers to wear and kept telling me they won’t notice how big it is on me.Imagine, I wear a size 38 and he wears probably a size 43/44.He kept forcing me to wear it saying, it won’t be noticed.

   Romans 12:2 “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

   The word for “conformed” as used in the command to not be conformed to this world could better be rendered, “do not let the world squeeze you into its form” so we are told to not let the world conform us or shape us but rather, be transformed by a renewing of the mind and this is important so we can “discern what is the will of God” and what’s “good and acceptable and perfect” for us. It’s not our peers who should mold us into their image but be molded or shaped into the image of an obedient follower of Christ.

the society would push you into what you don’t want to do. 

they’ll force you.

they’ll make you believe that your circumstances should make you settle for less. 

they’ll deceive you into believing that nobody would notice if you become indulged in that act! 

they’ll paint the picture so well for you that if you’re not smart you’d become a victim.Mind you, the society doesn’t know what you’ve been through or stuff they just want to blend you into the way they want.The guy wasn’t concerned if i had shoes or not or if that was the only sandals i was managing, he just wanted me to wear his shoe that was the main thing and all he was concerned about.

Who would want to be you?

Hello sweethearts, I’m trying my best to be consistent.

Well,today I’ll blogging about a topic i think we’re all guilty about.

For a long time,I battled with being so skinny,for a long time i battled with being so short,for a long time,I battled     with being stuck with glasses,you think it’s only dark people that bleach because they want to be light skinned?

Many at times people said “Ahn ahn,you’re this fair,your body itches and burns you under the sun,you can practically see nothing without your glasses,a part of your hair is coloured,they would even come up to me and touch my hair and say”E remain small make e be afin o,na afin no be birth mark”are you sure you’re not an albino?” And I’m like “me,Albino???” Sometimes, I would feel turning black is the best thing for.I battled with my wrinkled hands and legs. People would say “Do you always bathe with hot water?” Like,the hot water would roast and fry my skin.
But i use those same hands to perform wonders with my pen. I battled with the irregular shape of my nose without even stopping for a moment to see the beauty.

Most of us are so deep into wanting to be like others, we all want to be each other’s clone.

Have you ever asked yourself, “Who would want to be like me?”Without doubt, Being yourself is the easiest thing to do when it comes to BUILDING yourself. It requires no uneccesary energy. you don’t have to waste your time trying to be someone’s clone because,you are you!

There’s beauty in everything in case you’ve not noticed.You don’t have to copy everything you see.

In primary school,primary 4 to be specific, there was this particular girl who was always squinting her eyes all the time to see distant object and I thought it was very cute coupled with the fact that she’s actually pretty too.So,I started squinting my eyes to look at practically everything.

Unluckily for me,that was the year i started wearing glasses ,and i found out how difficult it must have been for her to be short sighted and without glasses. I felt so bad for her because it was either her parents could not afford one or she didn’t tell them.

Have we even asked ourselves, who would want to be like me?

I hope we know that looking up to someone (mentor) is different from cloning someone (copy copy)We’re all beautiful in our different ways.We don’t have to be like people to be happy .to be honest,cloning someone belittles our self esteem.HeYou would always have the mentality that YOU’RE NOT ENOUGH!You’ll be stuck with mentality that God left something out when creating you.

I’ve been a victim of low self esteem and i won’t say I’ve fully recovered, we would always think of the wrong ways to better ourselves.We are all created in God’s image and likeness, so let’s strive to be ourselves. Let’s stick to our skin,race,tribe etc and see the beauty in it.

The devil visited.

Ahhhh,so right now,I don’t know what to write but I’ll just write as it flows.

  Honestly and sincerely, I really don’t know what to write cause I’ve not been in a perfect mood these few days.these past weeks have practically been my worst. My spiritual life was totally going down the drain before my very eyes. I was zero on studying the bible,I couldn’t even meditate as i should. Praying became work for me.The only thing i could do was practically mutter a word or two of what i couldn’t even comprehend myself or sometimes prayers of request all the time. I fell in and out of sin like my destiny was entwined with the devil’s.Worst of all!!! I could hear God talk to me no more (Ahhhhhhhhh, very scary)i would complain and complain and he would’nt still say a word or maybe he was but my ears were just deaf to him.before,it was like I could directly hear him talking to me.it was a struggle. I yearned for his voice but nothing came.

  Few days back,I decided that enough was enough! If God has activated something in my life then who was the devil to close my ears to it. I started out a new strategy… I buckled up and started taking my prayer life more effectively like my life depended on it.actually it does.I got acquainted with Christian books and started reading and understanding God more on a whole nother level. Still,i didn’t hear a word from him.There’s something I’ve been really in need of but i decided to give it all to God ,so i left everything to him, I focused on going along with his plan.then the Devil came again and this time,The devil’sssss voice was so clear “If he couldn’t do just this for you,then why are you serving him?why not just be neutral, no religion? ( the devil didn’t ask me to stop being a believer o, he asked me to STAY NEUTRAL) ohhhhhh… For a second, I thought of giving in to his tactics and going with him .since I’ve not heard from My father,why don’t i just go along with who i have heard from. But i felt the need to pray in my spirit. I wasn’t ready to free for the devil this time around..mehnnnnnn,I went on my knees and prayed… Shortly after i was done, I heard him speak ” What about those that got there before you? ” I was practically frozen. So, my daddy hasn’t forgotten me after all.

 That same midnight,around past 2 to be precise,I was reading a book when a text popped in from my aunt. Practically I’ve told her about the situation before and the reply i got from her simply meant “People were there before you” .Not only did God speak to me directly, he also spoke through someone else.

  We’re Believers, definitely circumstances would arise, problems would come,The devilllllllll would try, we are humans so definitely,we would fall in and out of sin but one thing is sure. Our daddy’s love and grace never fails us. 

Remember,I had nothing in mind to do with this blog post.I wrote as it came. Have a fruitful weekend